The Morning After the Battle of Tenaru
Like John Basilone on the morning of August 21st after the Battle of the Tenaru, surveying the endless corpses strewn across the Guadalcanal battlefield along the perimeter of Henderson airfield, feeling totally enervated and dazed, I open my office door on April 16th to Tartarus and see boxes, papers, envelopes, folders, files, cabinet drawers, books, wrappers of Snickers and Starburst, and M&M peanuts lying here, there, and everywhere. As lifeless as the shades of heroes on the Fields of Asphodel after quenching their insatiable thirsts in the pools of Lethe, I had survived another endless tax season of countless bonsai charges of crazed clients across the river Matanikau. Why I sojourn to Hades with the regularity of a faithful Persephone for three months every year for the few shekels I charge is beyond me and Platonic reasoning. My wife thinks I am nuts and that I should go directly to Hades and remain there for eternity, since my tax season stress is killing her. Methinks my four cats agree.
And do my clients appreciate my low fees and sleepless nights on their behalf? Absolutely not. With deductive reasoning as adroit as that of Aristotle, if not as clever as that of a Sophist, they deduce that since my fees are modest in comparison to those of other certified public accountants, that so must the quality of my services be proportionately inferior to those of the higher priced CPAs. Duh?!
I am ready to rejoin the land of the living, where nightly walks are now possible, a few moments of affection with a demanding kitty are now enjoyed without guilt, and even a few amorous minutes with my beloved before she enters la la land can be indulged. So why on April 18th do I find myself before a computer screen, typing an entry into my blog when the sun is shining here in Berlin, Connecticut and the temperature is approaching 55 degrees, and the hyacinths, crocuses, and daffodils are blooming and the twenty bird feeders in my backyard need replenishing? Dunno: CPA habit, but I’m out of here now before killer cardiac arrest arrives. And I heartedly recommend the same to all. We're all wasted, and now it’s recess. Go outside, have some fun, and live a little. It's playtime!
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