Accountants Provide Humorous Alternatives for 'XYZ'
Before the AICPA reached its final decision, Electronic Accountant, the online counterpart to the print publication, Accounting Today, conducted a contest among its readers to choose a name for the professional designation.
The tongue-in-check name entries received by Electronic Accountant demonstrate that, contrary to some public opinion, accountants have a humorous side. Runners up for the grand prize of a Palm V handheld computer include:
- CUBIC - Certified Universal Business Information Consultant - described by Atlanta CPA Rob Augenstein as "the multidimensional accountant."
- Carnak - One Who Knows Everything - a nod to former Today show host Johnny Carson's famous turbaned character, submitted by Carmel, Calif. CPA Suzanne Frueh.
- Quaestor - Ancient Roman officials responsible for finance and administration - described by Rhea Stadtmauer, who suggests it can also be shortened to "Q" for the all-knowing race in the Star Trek series.
- Omnipitor - A kissing cousin to "Cognitor," it describes an all-knowing being. "We're looking forward to adding this on the door in big, bright letters, maybe some flashing neon," write Sherman Oaks, Calif. CPA Bill "Ominipitor."
- CDA - Gill, Colorado accountant Brian D. Kennedy cut to the chase with his entry, defined as "Certified to Do Anything."
- New Coke - Martinsville, Va. CPA Christina Mallard zings the AICPA with her reference to the disastrous attempt by the Coca-Cola company to mess with its famous brand.
- NNN - Los Angeles, Calif. Finance executive George Noreika makes no bones about his opinion of the proposed credential with this moniker, which stands for "No test. No credibility. No acceptance."
- Certified Business Hustler - University of Texas professor of accounting Harley Courtney shows his disdain for the global credential with his choice. "My understanding is that the certification will cover a broad range of competencies. This appellation will cover almost anything one desires to do."
The contest winner who, according to editors at Electronic Accountant, submitted the most creative, pithy, and appropriate replacement for the "XYZ" description is Newington, Conn. CPA Paul H. Glotzer with the name, KIA: Know It All.